Happy New Year

I danced and wrote my way into 2014. I have been a little scared about writing these last chapters of my book. But I broke through today and wrote chapter 8. The beginning of the book was easier because it was about everything I learned in the past to get to where I am now. But these last chapters are about where I am and it is a little harder to write. I have found that through writing I am creating a pathway and that I can only take people as far as I have been willing to go myself. So in order to write I have to experience. It has been very healing. I am writing about other people’s magnificence who have experienced mental illness and in order to do that I need to be comfortable with my own. Dancing has certainly helped. I am so grateful that I have conscious dance now as a way to create my life anew and to deal with everything that has come before. My friend asked me yesterday why I am so happy these days and I really thought about my answer. The reason I nm so happy is because I have cleared out all the old stuff in my life that was holding me back and I am so much more present and open to the beauty and love that life offers every day. I truly am at a new place in my life. I am much more free than I have ever been before. I know what is mine to do and I know how to do it. That in itself is incredibly beautiful and joyful. For now, I need to keep writing and dancing and walking and doing yoga and mothering  my children. That makes me very happy because those are all labors of love.

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