River

I need a river. I need a river flowing softly in its banks. I am a river. I am a river raging out of its banks destroying everything and nothing in its path. The only word I have ever heard inside my head and my heart is beauty. And now it is fury. Because I am still stopped. And so is everyone I care about, including my littlest ones. And some big ones are doing fine. And some would still deny us. And some know nothing at all. But I know so much. And so do the ones that are listening to me go on all day as a volcano. I will not tolerate it for one more second I say, and they agree but they must tolerate me in their helplessness. And in their absolute power. Today I began a new book called A Rooted Nourishment. It will be a cookbook and a call to activism through words and art and sacred justice like the world has never seen. And plenty of people will ignore it. But you never will. And then you will eat. And you will write. And then you will dance. And you will sing. And you will do your law and your yoga and your art and your numbers. And you will do it long and well and so will your children and the world will never be the same because you will understand much better than I ever can. Because you are just that way. And you always have been. The earth will bloom. The trees will make flowers and nuts. And the animals will walk among us when they choose to. And we will all be happy. And so will the ones who still choose to ignore and hurt us for a time because they will think they are home finally in our world. But they will not be eventually and God will make sure of it. God does not suffer fools. But I must still. I am home, I am writing, I am singing, I am working, I am mostly eating and I am doing okay. But I am furious and I do not see an end to it. Today I found out that a little girl that I love has to be confined for six more months and I can do nothing about it. And then I still can’t give her what I promised her which is everything because she is beautiful and she has nothing, not even her own room or her own clothes or her own food or her own books. And her mothers are rich. No one can do anything about it that I have asked and she has been told what she will be given and she says she’ll be okay but she is sad because it is not what she most wants. Well, she should not be sad. She should be let go to live her life. Among her loves.

This will be my last facebook post and my last blog post for a long time. I will not speak of this again. Ever. I am only one woman and I am fierce and I am honest and I am a writer and a speaker with a voice and I am told I have a lot of power. Even in this moment. But I do not believe it. A Sacred Nourishment will come out on ebook on Amazon and so will A Rooted Sight and A Rooted Mind After All and A Rooted Body and Meditations for Rooted Living and my collected works of poetry when the angels make it so. My art and the books you can hold in your hands will come out when I and my team can get to it. A Sacred Nourishment in its cookbook form will take I don’t know how long because I have to use everything in me to make that art and I have lots of other work to do. And sometimes I have to rest and play.

You are beautiful. You are brilliant. And you are doing all the right things all the time. Don’t worry. Don’t fret, listen to music and nature and people that are always supporting you and ignore the rest the best you can. Even the pretty ones, because they are not pretty, they are mean and they torture you. As they do me when they are not medicating me or confining me or harassing me or ignoring me. Find your own way with the others and you will do just fine. And I know you will be so joyous at what the earth and the angels provide in their bounty and their love.

I am going on retreat like the pink dolphins and the manatees and the gorillas. And I am writing and I am making art and I am finding grace.  And I am sitting constantly with the laws that need to change so our children can inherit the earth. The whales insist on it. And so do the trees.

I love you. Be well. The moon is constant and so are the tides.