I watch the mountains

I watch the mountains everyday now several times a day. Fascinating, really, the things I see. The architecture is always changing. So are the trees. The trees are enormous. White birches, silver birches, cedars, all kinds of oaks and walnuts. It was so balmy and warm yesterday. I went for two walks. I got two new pairs of shoes. One pair, my boots fit wonderfully but the others are cut wrong. So they kill my feet and it was a waste. I have no car so I can’t really send them back. Plus, I have no money to go anywhere. My bank account was hacked again. I straightened it out after like two hours of being on the phone with a woman who constantly apologized but the shoes really wiped me out. Waiting two weeks to get paid again. I also got like $500 of groceries from Whole Foods. So, I’m pretty broke right now. It is okay. The walks are really helping me. And I sit outside a lot and study the skyline. I’m having a little issue with faith again today after doing fine because my ex-husband contacted me about the house and I have to deal with that. I never have any warning with anyone. I’m always just going along in the sight with people and boom, they just show up with the opposite or something unexpected in my physical life. Like getting taken away in handcuffs which is pretty hard to forget. It makes me feel terribly unsafe when it happens. I think I might be the least informed person on the planet as the one that has to hold the reiki. I have learned a lot of things lately about the truth of when people say I have gone psychotic and when I have felt out of myself in some way. And it is all totally believable. And I can watch things change around me in nature and in the skyline instantaneously. I am still trapped in some isolated world somehow. But everyone that has ever truly loved me and supported me is with me now. And it is so lovely, the time we spend together and the things we discover every day. The only ones that are lost are the ones that want to be. The others are right beside me. We can’t really start studying until I am free to function in the real world. But we do learn constantly anyway. I have no complaints, really. I just got shocked again by the other world reality and I am waiting for a response and I don’t know how negative it will be. I just feel vulnerable is all. Have you been observing the spring? Have you noticed the trees changing? Have you been surrounded by birds as I have? I am constantly in the midst of the bird nation. They sing, they fly, they flock. I think I am going outside now because I hear them calling. Namaste, friends. I am expecting good things in the next four days. I just got a little discouraged by a text is all. I just don’t know if I am going to get harassed. I probably won’t though. I have to hold on and be brave once again. Wish me luck, peoples.